Vegas

Whew. What a whirlwind of a weekend.
Left Oregon midafternoon on Wednesday and arrived in Sin City at about 10'o'clock that night.  We went to eat at Mesa, which is Bobby Flay's restaurant there at Ceasars.  We had THE best quesadilla.  It was crispy, and filled with chicken and all these chilies, and topped with guacamole and lettuce. So simple but so amazing.  Also had some amazing peach margaritas.
Lets just say it was a great way to start our Vegas trip.

Just to give you an idea of WHY we were in Vegas, let me explain.  Almost every year the women of my family get together and have gone to Vegas, to celebrate birthdays, achievements, anything important.  When I get to go it makes it so there are 4 generations of our family there.   Frances is my grandma's aunt, so it makes it pretty awesome.  I was too young for most of the trips, but now that I'm getting older, I get to go more now!
The first night we had gma all to ourselves, so we just relaxed and hungout, because that meant that the next morning, Joy and Frances got there. They changed the whole dynamic of the trip.  Granted that grandma is 70 somthing, Joy is 65 and Frances is 97!! and she's more mobile then people in their 70's!  So me and mom were the young ones of the group. 
We went out to Peynard's for breakfast on thursday, which is an amazing french bistro-style restaurant.  Had some of the best eggs benidict I've ever had in my life, the croissant was light and airy, while the hollendaise was rich and deep. Could of ate it all week!

Each day we were in Vegas, mom and me went to the Apollo pool at Ceasars and baked ourselves in the sun.  We only lasted about 2 hours each day, seemed like the sun was so much hotter here then at home.  But in just a few days, using this stuff called, Maui Babe Browning Lotion, I have to say that I am considerably tanner then when I arrived. And I'm a whitey! :)

Since Las Vegas doesnt have any of the no smoking bans like Oregon, everywhere we went was cloudy with cigarette smoke, and man did it give me a killer headache.  I had a migrain for the first two days, it was terrible.  I was pumped full of Tylenol and all sorts of pain meds, but nothing worked.  Not even Tylenol PM.  But when Friday evening rolled around, magically after dinner my headache went away! :) I blame it on the amazing italian food we ate at Rao's.

Rao's is this famous little restaurant that used to be in NY,  and was just a tiny mom and pop type place, but word started getting out about it, and then it got bigger and bigger, and now its in LV. :)  They have the best Penne ala Vodka ever.  We also got some Veal Parmiggiana. YUM.  It was pounded so flat, and it was so tender you could cut it with a spoon.  And to top the meal off, we got some Ricotta cheesecake, which is my new favorite thing.  It was so light and sweet with just a little bit of tart from the lime zest. Man o Man. Was I in heaven there!

After dinner we walked around Bellagio and went to watch the dancing fountains, which are always one of my favorite things to see. After that, everyone pretty much went to bed. Mom and me stuck a few bucks into some fish machine, and I won just enough to get my hair done. :) SWEET! poor baby needs some attention.

Oh Thursday night, after dinner mom and I went to go see this exhibit called, Bodies.  It was incredible.  This artist took human remains and soaked them in acetone, to remove all the water from our tissues and then replaced it with a polymer, so that when the procedure was finished, the bodies and muscles looked the exact same, but there wasnt any flesh anymore, it was just a waxy substance.  It was spectacular, he took the brain and pumped red polymer through the veins so that then all the flesh was discarded and all that was left was this matrix of red lines.  It was so amazing, I cant even explain.  They wouldnt let us take pictures in most of the places we went, so I dont have alot of documentation of Vegas.

Oh! On Sat, Mom, me and Joy, went to watch Cirque du Soilel: Zumanity.  That was a great show, it was 90 min of sex, and dancing, and laughter. I havent laughed that hard in a long time.  I strongly suggest it to anyone visiting LV. 

So yesterday was our last day in Vegas, so we went to our goodbye lunch at Todd English's Olives.  Which by the way had some amazing food.  I got a Bucatini with lamb and pork meatballs, which were so velvety it was hard to not stuff your face. :)  Mom got a lumb crab carbonara, and that was just as delicious! It was hard to not have good food there, everything is so perfect. Ugh. I stuffed my face for 4 days pretty much

Now its diet time. :)

I was so happy to get home last night, its always so nice to be back in your bed, sleeping next to the person your used to sleeping with. :) staying up every night we were there, and then getting home at 2 was killing my sleep.  So much so that I didnt even hear Jerrod get up this morning, lights on and everything. 

Now I'm dealing with all this crap about my car, its still not shifting right, toyota thinks its a recalled part, but my car might have too many miles for the recall to be free, which is bullshit. its a fucking recall, not my fault. But the part wont be in for a month,so I dont know what we're going to do.  I dont have time for this shit right now. Ugh.  What a way to wake up after vacation. 

Two weeks into fall and its 91 degrees.
What happened to the days when right after labor day, the crisp winds blew in, and the air gets cooler.
The sun warms the midday but when the sun starts to set the cool night air blows in, forcing us to wear sweatshirts and jeans. 
Those are my favorite times of the year.
I love wearing my peacoats and scarves with jeans and comfy grandma shoes. 
I am ready for those days. 
Can they just be here yet?


On another note:
I am the happiest I've been in a long time.
Lately all the stress of my state boards and wedding and weight have been wearing my down into this creature that wasnt me.

I was irritable and grouchy and short temperd.  Everything seemed to make me either get mad or cry.
I felt like I was on this teeter totter of emotions and it was weighing me down.
Jerrod was noticing it, and I kept saying it was stress, hoping that I was right.

I got to a point when I thought, Am I depressed? 
Do I have a problem? 

There were a few nights that after studying till my brain felt like it melted that I would go into our bedroom to watch some movie or some show, that I would find myself wimpering and crying to myself.
I was afraid to let Jerrod in.
I was afraid I was turning into someone that he would want.
Someone that he could'nt love.

It doesnt help that all the pressure of getting married is starting to sink in.
Its the one day that you are supposed to be beautiful.
But when I look in the mirror, I dont feel beautiful.
I dont know if I've ever felt that way when I look at my reflection.

I've never been skinny, never been a size two.
Sure he says he loves me the way that I am, but sometimes there's part of me that wonders, 'would he love me more if I was skinnier'
I know that these aren't healthy thoughts by any means.

What I never understood was, I eat healthy, I'm active. What happened.

Then there comes the wedding dress.
Brides are supposed to be in the best shape of their lives.
They are supposed to be breathtaking in their dresses. 
Will I feel that way when I find my dress?
Will I feel the way that you're supposed to?
I pray that I do.
Everyday I pray that I will look into the mirror and see a beautiful person staring back at me.



Trust me.
Ever since I took my test and that stress was dissolved, I feel so much better. 
I slept the best I have in weeks last night.  I fell asleep early and stayed asleep.
Up until the test date, I was having a hard time sleeping, tossing and turning for hours.
But I slept AMAZING. It was so wonderful waking up this morning.

Also I feel like the woman that I'm supposed to be.  I am going to be a succesful LMT. I am going to be a wonderful wife, and an amazing mother when that time comes.

Lately we've even been talking about kids. I give Jerrod about a year and a half until he's ready.
We were laying in bed last Sunday, discussing our future.  We realized that we're ready to have a family. And a dog alone doesnt count.
We are thinking about waiting to get a dog till after the wedding, just for the sake of the puppy.
We didnt want to have to ask someone to puppysit a 10 month old lab. who knows what kind of damage that would do to another persons house.
=)

Wow, this is getting alot longer then I expected. 
Its time for bed, I have a few more episodes of Bones to watch.

And to leave you with an adorable picture of a BloodHound puppy.  Who will be named Copper.

Imma hound dog. aru ru ru ru.

Today I made an appt for Davids Bridal. EEEEKKK!
I know that the moment that I try on those beautiful dresses that it will truely sink in that

I'm getting MARRIED!!!!!!!

Even though we're planning things and getting the day figured out, i think its still kind of surreal to me. I couldnt imagine it any other way.  Jerrod and me and grown up so much in the past two years, and grown together in a way that has entertwined our hearts. 

So far we have these things booked/planned:

-DJ

-Dancefloor

-Tables and Chairs

-Table decorations

-Food

-Save the Dates/Invitations

We know somewhat how we're going to have the bridal party dress, the boys in Tux's and the girls in some dress, one I havent quite decided on.

I have chosen a photographer but need to nail down the date. :)

And we still have to nail down the 'bar' portion of the wedding, we know we are going to rent one of those keg trailors that have a cooler on one side, so we can store wine and other things in there.

Hmmm.... What else am I missing...

So off to another topic:

Jerrod had to work late last night, so I thought that after Zumba I would be a good house wife and make him a sweet treat, so I wipped up some mini cherry cheesecakes as a suprise. Welp, he didnt work as long as he said, so he got home early, right in the middle. So it wasnt as much of a suprise as I had hoped but he was grateful for the gesture. :)



Here they are! :) Dont they look delicious?

If not you're crazy! They are amazing, and even though I forgot that they needed to cool down with the oven and I took them out so their tops fell a little, and sunk in. But they taste the same as they would if you would have let them cool slowly. :) O-Well!

After reading a dear friend of mines rant about maritial problems being blasted on facebook. AH. I feel the same. Since when is it the worlds problem that you are having a disagreement with your spouse.  There are so many people that are putting these complaints on facebook to such a degree that it feels like they are fishing for attention.

Then there are other people that rant on facebook that doesnt bother me, that I find amusing and I love reading it. Maybe its the content of their rants that decide the difference. If you are fighting with your significant other, why are you on facebook updating your status? How about going back to the moment and trying to work through it and get over it, instead of telling the world. UGH

Ok over it. :) Done.

Haha I'm watching WifeSwap right now and its always guarenteed to make me laugh.  They always chose people who are polar opposites of eachother, today its a woodsy/outdoor family and a manhattan/billionair family. Bwahaha. She wore heels to chop firewood. :)

Alright. Off to study some pathology :)

&hearts