There was a woman in the shop that was talking about how she is a truck driver with her husband. She said she has seen countless marriages fail when the couple decides to drive together. She often asks the couples, are you friends. Of course they respond, yes we love eachother very much.
This is a common answer for this question. She said she has to repeat the question. Are you friends. Best friends? Most couples dont know how to answer. She has a valid point. People often meet someone and become friends, but then they get lost in the lust and the chase of the relationship, and forget how to be friends with their lover. They get caught up in sex and intimacy and all the emotions that serious relationships have. When you are friends with someone you have different emotions, similar but they are invested differently. You arent as concerned if you are going to ruin the rest of the night at the house, or if you are going to mess up your luck at getting laid. When you are friends, you hang out and you then have your space.
I have realized that I dont ever want to lose that friendship I have with him.
I love that we can go on roadtrips or just hang out and make eachother laugh and be honest without cause for concern about hurting eachothers feelings.
I feel for those who lose that friendship and get lost in the relationship. How miserable would it be to be in love with your spouse but you dont like them? Sure its easy to love someone but to like them is a whole new ball game.
People blame love as some unsceen force that they have no control over, but you chose to get past the liking stage to get to love. Don't regret love, every love that you experience, whether its platonic or intimate, shapes you. It allows you to love in a new and different way. Because every single person loves and likes differently.
Even though it isnt something that goes along with my post, I will leave this with one of my favorite quotes
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” - Marianne Williamson